Poetry

A hundred million shells of white

Each one the same and side by side

All joined as one and huddled tight

Beneath the sunlit ocean tide

Are seen from space in disbelief

To decorate the endless sea

Yet what brings beauty to the reef

Is boundless vast diversity

For if each piece were all the same

The reef would surely lose mystique

And life, in turn, would feel so lame

If all who live were not unique

There’s something I have lost
Something from the past
And something I have missed
Throughout the years that passed

I can’t recall its name
I can’t recall its place
But the emptiness is real
Beneath the smile on this face

And in its absence I pretend
Though the mask is wearing thin
Yet without it I can’t be
All the things that I have been

When the apple tree has gifted all its fruit
And stands among the forest stark and dim
No longer will the sparrow in commute
Stop to rest upon its barren limbs

When the pomegranate shares away its seed
And has no more to offer to the lark
No longer will the weary stop to feed
When the table has but solitude and bark

I have not yet to this far world gave
A fraction of the feelings I have found
And sadly I will likely to the grave
Rest in thoughts my words could not resound

And yet I struggle daily to confide
The wondrous things abound upon the day
Tipping that deep basin kept inside
To flood the land in my own weary way

With all that I in blessing have been shown
And all that I in spirit have conceived
God’s beauty is too vast for me alone
In but a thousand lifetimes to perceive

Be not thine own familiar foe
Let opportunity not pass unto the night
Let day not stand the bearer of thy woe
And chance the faded shaming of thy sight

Be not thy private adversary’s kin
And cast remorse upon the able soul
Let not derision occupy thy post within
Nor on the fires of pity pitch the coal

God lend me some perfection
You have saved for summer’s eve
Beneath a fog of failed rejection
I must beg to be relieved

God send me some sweet vision
In your guidance I shall trust
For departure from derision
I beseech you if I must

God give me some assurance
That in time I will prevail
God bless me with endurance
In these times of no avail

In speaking to the tree a wasted word
In time confiding in the stars above
In flying through the sky beside the bird
I gave to them a moment of my Love

In watching that sweet sunset fall below
In walking past the unbeknowing fern
In spending time in silence as I go
I lent to them compassion in return

In but a single piece of frozen time
My eyes beheld a sight that could not be
A moment cast forever in sublime
A glimpse of what I’ve always longed to see

I closed my eyes a second to be certain
That on the other side was just as real
As she that I have seen beneath the curtain
Of a dream that seemed so perfect and surreal

And when my eyes had opened in return
From that unspoken magical domain
Her eyes reflected all that I have yearned
With all the beauty of the falling rain

The light was cast upon her timeless face
That but the fairest angel could compare
And I was lost in her enchanted grace
In one amazing solitary stare

For one brief moment all had disappeared
And we were standing silent and alone
In but a single moment more sincere
Than any I had ever come to know

Be this light the light of dreams
And none that shall compare
Ever fell among the beams
Or spoke unto the air

Be this day the day of dreams
And those yet to arrive
In silence or in faded screams
On this day will derive

Be this night the night of dreams
And all that passed before
Fall into forgotten seams
On far forsaken shores

Be this girl the girl of dreams
And time shall cease to be
Night and day and all extremes
Will halt at Love’s decree

Sunlight take away from me
All the things I have
Give me all that you may deem
Perfection cannot make me sad

Strip the borders of my soul
Thread the needle of my eye
Give me that which makes me whole
Adjust the rhythm of my mind

And when it all is said and done
And I have been set free
I shall thank the sacred sun
For giving life to me

Should heaven be on the way
At the passing of the stay
At the breaking of the night
Would you be in my sight?

Should heaven be on the way
At the turning of the bay
At the sinking of the sea
Would you belong to me?

Should heaven be on the way
At the closing of the day
In the eden high above
Would we still be in Love?

Without thinking, without blinking
Is the feeling all but gone
Is it burning, is it yearning
To come out and sing its song

And when it does will I have known
That all that’s lost is lost for good
And all that comes is better grown
From all that’s lived and understood

Or will it slip beneath my grip
And sail forever on the wind
Leaving only anguish on the lip
Of he who stands where he begins

Where must one man go
To find the fairest falls
How far the river flows
How loud the mountain calls

Where must one descend
To find the lowest low
How quick the seasons end
How deep the canyons go

Where must one arise
To reach the highest high
How bright the brightest skies
How sad the saddest sigh

And where in all of time
Can be found the proper place
For a lifetime of sublime
An eternity of grace

Clouds that gathered in the dark
Amassed above the peak
Withdraw their post without remark
And fade unto the meek

Tides that swell beneath the moon
Bestowing seeds of pain
Fall in shades of deep maroon
Regressing with the rain

Cold that billows in the shade
Resurging from the past
Feels the warmth of day pervade
The murmur of the vast

It matters not how black the night
How dark the midnight shore
Time will pass beneath the light
Of morning washed ashore

Why do I hurt?
I’ll tell thee why
For all the faded feelings I belie
For all the coy confusions of the heart
And all the sad impressions I impart

Why do I cry?
I’ll tell thee why
To slay the beastly visions of my eye
To liberate the demons of delight
And free the wicked creatures of the night

Why do I write?
I’ll tell thee why
To slay the surly savages awry
To drown the haunting nightmares in my sleep
And save the subtle secrets that I keep

Many moons have bound this heart
To one unearthly star
Fostered feelings in the light
And cradled dreams afar

Yet altered in the light of morn
And scattered by the day
Are moments lost in time forlorn
Adrift in disarray

Awaiting that untimely sleep
Of sunlight’s daily chore
For achromatic skies to keep
Alive the nights before

The daily dance of sun and moon
Of seasons dark and light
Of feelings colored sad maroon
Rekindled in the night

I could fill a notebook every day
With all the things I hope to someday do
All the places I would like to go
And every girl that I pretend is you

No place that I have been can quite compare
To any place that I have yet to see
And no girl that I have met is even close
To what I’ve always visioned you to be

All of my surroundings
Shine like paint upon my skin
Concealing all the secrecy
That slumbers deep within

All the world ever sees
Is my unfaltering veneer
Yet beneath the dry exterior
Quite distant shores appear

Whether sunlight falls or star
I cannot seem to show
The truth that I conceal
The subtleties that flow

Underneath the dour shadow
That is blanketing the sky
Is the purest form of sunlight
That has breached the arrant high

Far beyond the things I see
Past what cannot be attained
Lies to some obscure degree
A feeling wholly unexplained

Hidden under veils of care
Safe behind a wall of grief
Beauty lies quite unaware
To those who live without belief

And if they never think to look
Beyond the surfaces that show
Time will ever close the book
On all that they could ever know

Life will simply come and go
Days will pass without goodbye
And most will sadly never know
The secrets life cannot deny

I want to be the one you call
When nothing seems to go your way
I want to catch you when you fall
And lift you from the disarray

I want to be the perfect sight
That steals your gentle breath away
I want to shield you from the night
And fill you with the light of day

I want to be the endless spring
That pushes winter back in time
I want to be the one to bring
A higher level of sublime

I want to be your soon to come
I want to be your past
I want to be your only one
I want to be your first and last

Crawling on the jungle floor
Inches from the wilted green
Failing in the search for more
Longing for the truth unseen

Dragging on with battered limb
Stretching out among the weeds
Begging each to bring the end
To all of life’s forsaken needs

Watching as the trees go by
Listening to whispers told
Screaming out a silent cry
For secrets lost in years of old

Timeless suns and countless moons
Sentries on a distant wing
Singing in the faintest tunes
That winter ever bringeth spring

A cloud of darkened purple
Sits above a sea of black
Protecting all that lies beneath it
Catching dust upon its back

High above the colors fade
From purple to a deep azure
A perfect mix of every essence
That the world has kept pure

And far below the blanket sky
Resting softly in the vast
Lies a world undisturbed
Yet forsaken just as fast

I can still remember the first time
I saw a drop of rain fall from the sky
I understood not why it must descend
And wondered if the source was heaven’s eye

But what would cause the sanctified to weep
And who could be distressed upon the high
For nothing where it lands could quite compare
To the houses of the holy in the sky

This distant land is new to me
Yet sacred all the same
The past is but a memory
Where echoes call my name

And far behind me lies a time
When I could barely see
When I could only halfway climb
The smallest of the trees

And I have seen a thousand years
Pass by in disarray
And watched the moon light fallen tears
That grace the light of day

And all are lost who disbelieve
That time cannot be saved
That Love cannot be bottled up
And taken past the grave

I wish I had control
To take advantage of the days
To find the ocean of my soul
And ride a thousand different waves

I wish I had the valor
To release from this embrace
And put the words that I empower
In the actions that I chase

I wish I had the wisdom
Not to fear the things I learn
And for once to find the courage
Not to run from what I yearn

A thousand days of wisdom
Could not save me in the end
And a lifetime of forgiveness
Would not leave me on the mend

So I wonder would it matter
If the days laid front to back
And the first step of the ladder
Was the only one that cracked

If I took the light of summer
And lit the darkness in the night
Would the words that echoed from her
Sound much different in the light?

Half my life is spent on dreams
Half trying to forget
The sultry days amidst the beams
Of suns before they set

Half is wasted in the street
Half inside the square
Rushing madly to the beat
Sad and silent in the chair

Half consumed in daily fret
Half on plans to be
A congregation of regret
A raft upon the sea

Sometimes I think I forget
Where it is and where it began
The desert where the ocean sat
The valley where the river ran

And sometimes all I ever need
Is the journey through it all
Not to touch the grounded trees
But simply listen as they fall

And sometimes I think I was right
And sometimes I just pray
And maybe I just need the night
To justify the day

I’ve said it all before a thousand times
And waited for the stars to show concern
I’ve practiced to the rain with no reply
And whispered to the wind with no return

It echoes through the heart of passing years
And lives a secret life beneath my eyes
It’s spoken to the ground through fallen tears
And given to the night without disguise

And yet without exception it will stay
A solitary secret on the run
A rumor passed between the night and day
A desert lost in time without the sun

As I am passing by below
This perfect summer night
I see her light is still aglow
Third window from the right

Calling me with silhouettes
And touching me with grace
Erasing all of my regrets
With one look of her face

She takes away my memories
The future and the past
And tosses me unto the seas
To sink among the vast

Tomorrow never seems to be
And yesterday was not
The present is eternity
And now my only shot

And looking up I wish for more
Than silhouettes to find
But on this night as all before
The fear defeats the mind

So I go passing by below
This perfect summer night
And watch the light retract its glow
Third window from the right

Yesterday and days before
Reaching back to light the way
The moon was dancing on the shore
And laughing with the light of day

The stars above and far behind
In distant lands of solitude
Echoed in attempts to find
A life in doubt to be renewed

The sun upon its golden throne
Burned so deep into our soul
Where seeds of childhood atone
What maturation has controlled

And satellites of the beyond
On flights immortal in the skies
Force the passing to respond
Through the windows of the eyes

Please take me to the place of greatest awe
And let me stare into the face of God
So He may wash away my greatest flaw
The unbefitting grief of my facade

Please take me to the purist water’s edge
And let me dip my hand in righteousness
So I may stand upon that sacred ledge
And cast away the sorrows I possess

Then take me to the most dejected place
Forsaken and forgotten by decree
So I may offer my undaunted grace
And do for it what God has done for me

I understand
I’m older now
I’ve seen the truth
Get lost somehow

But I remember
How it used to be
When time was endless
When life was free

When years were long
When days were bright
When dark was dark
And light was light

Without the haze
Without the gray
Without the truth
We found a way

And now I sit
And now I cry
For memories lost
For time gone by

For youthfulness
For dignity
For innocence
For purity…

I cry

In times like these I seem to feel it all
From the highest mountain to the deepest fall
And here I always feel like I’m alone
A solitary king upon my throne

Watching all my kingdom from afar
And gazing at the smallest distant star
To find the thing it surely must be for
Waiting for me on that distant shore

Across the sea but closer than I know
Waiting for that guiding wind to blow
To push the sails with overwhelming force
Along the line of predetermined course

From lonely moon to sanctifying sun
From disconnected to becoming one
From just a single raindrop to the sea
From capture to the final setting free

I feel it all

Ever since you told me
It’s been burning deep inside
And from the flames that chase me
I can’t seem to run and hide

And yet I always keep it quiet
On the outside I am still
With every motion I defy it
As it shreds away my will

Where every night I feel the glow
Call to the prison in my heart
And still I have no place to go
So to my cell I must depart

This feeling is quite new
It’s not as if I meant it
Or even understand it
But still it lingers

Lingers like a sickness
That cripples my daily life
For I cannot quite ignore it
No matter how I try

And all the while I do not understand
What it is or where it came from
I could call it heartbreak
As I do everything else

But this time it feels like more
More than the usual dull pain
With added numbness that consumes me
With added fear that makes my insides boil
With all my nerves becoming restless
With all my thoughts surrounding it
A fog that can’t be lifted
A cloud that will not blow away
A rainy day that never ends
An endless winter

And still I do not understand

Which words do I declare
Beneath the midnight sky
As worthy for the air
Sufficient for goodbye

What thought can truth assure
What voice can Love resound
To brave the deep azure
To comfort puddled ground

And where do I begin
What journey can I find
To catch the hurt within
And rest a weary mind

It seems that every path I take is intersecting
With another headed off to breach the wall
Of faded fears and insecurities
Holding back with overbearing fear of fall

And I can only look from where I stand
Down the many roads that meet my own
And see off in the distance virgin lands
That forever will remain to me unknown

For I am filled with two distinctive wells
One filled with all the innocence of rain
That begs me not to fall under the spells
That creep beneath the other filled with pain

I can’t pretend it’s just a fable playing out inside
Or just a feeling on the rise simply trying to hide
And every time I feel the water falling all around
It wraps around me on the way to forgotten ground

But on my skin it burns with the touch of the sun
A pain I can’t escape no matter how fast I run
And so I stand there all alone in this ocean of pain
Screaming out the story to the inattentive rain

I’m sitting on the front porch
Of my life and all of time
Is stretching out before me
While the sun pretends to climb

And all the power in the world
Rests in my own weary voice
For I can change the journey
Of my life with but a choice

To leave it all for all untold
Or stay behind and make believe
That every dream I ever dreamt
Was never meant to be achieved

And so the choice becomes a quandary
With the power to direct
The very pathway of my life
And every point that I connect

So I am asking for a sign
From any willing to bestow
Or maybe I’ll just let the breeze
Guide me silent, soft, and slow

I saw the twilight of my life
Before I truly saw the dawn
And now I sit in sad remembrance
Of those seasons that are gone

Waiting for a second chance
Watching countless suns go by
Playing tug of war with time
To push it higher in the sky

And maybe for a breath or two
Success will ease my troubled mind
But what it seems defines the word
I’ve yet to notice or to find

Indeed with my own eyes, or maybe just
In dreams that surely like the nail will rust
I saw a glimpse of all that might and will
Be waiting for me patiently and still
Where sunlight falls in unison with time
As sleep evokes indulgence in its prime

And I awake from some design of sleep
With countless visions I shall try to keep
Yet in the solitude of day I find
A single glimpse still occupies my mind
Of living beyond all predestined paths
And planning not for fallen aftermaths
With but a single map to guide my way
A canvas blank on both sides of the day

Drowning pleasures in their pain
Drawing comfort from the rain
I ran along the road at best
And disregarded all the rest

Stopping for no breath of air
Reaching for the distant glare
And pulling back an empty hand
Still stinging from the reprimand

The road in laughter called my name
And trees beside me hung in shame
In circles had I run away
Direction all in disarray

And finally I heard the song
That I’d been missing all along
Caught up in every day’s affair
Distracted by my own despair

And thus begins a life renewed
Releasing all that’s been subdued
To burst afar and ride the wind
And feel my heart and soul ascend

In this land where mountians tower high
And echoes wander slowly through the day
I stand alone forever in July
And listen to the passing disarray

Whispers I can hear beneath the breeze
Softly, as the sound of falling snow
Cursing as they pass the faded trees
To change the way the stoic currents blow

So all that falls beneath may rise anew
To places long forgotten and unseen
And beauty that before was out of view
Will fill the longing spaces in between

It’s time to take a look inside
And search our inner-most feelings
All the places we used to hide
And end the cowardly sinning

For time has come to confess the deeds
That beat a hole in our conscience
And prepare ourselves to set sea
Beyond the harbor of nonsense

And on the open waters we’ll plea
To be forgiven at last
And let the waves of the sea
Cleanse the lands of the past

Inside I have a feeling and a fear
And though the truth is far, the dream is near
That I may feel a lifetime worth of sun
In just a moment’s time as few have done

And if my heart gets lost from time to time
Or burdened by the mountains yet to climb
I know upon my spirit it can trust
To be the mighty merchant if it must

And when the moon comes calling on my day
To nestle in the hills and fade away
I hope that I shall find another dawn
With all the present beauty and beyond

What will be remembered of the man
Who flees it all for nothing but the flee
Who drifts upon the nearest breeze he can
And questions not the path that sets him free

And who’s to say the place where treasure lies
Is lost afar or hidden in his hands
Or which will look the sweeter to the eyes
That search for what no other understands

And maybe all the harmony he craves
To calm the ebbing seas within himself
Is not the distant calling of the waves
But all along the solemn quest itself

Will I know when it is over
If the feelings I have known
Are raindrops in the ocean
Where the rivers all have flown

If I could learn the secrets
And the paths that they reveal
Could I live a thousand lifetimes
In the moment unconcealed

And if wishes all were granted
Would I choose what’s meant to be
Or trade a single raindrop
For a lifetime on the sea

I find myself swimming in daydreams
In lands arranged by the mind
And lose myself in illusions
To go anywhere else I can find

And joyful it is to be free
Where none can follow my way
And often a lifetime is spent
In the single escape of a day

But when I do open my eyes
And the world lacks all that I need
I reach back on the beauty inside
And slowly and softly recede

Beyond the horizon
Unseen by the eye
Yet always afar
And lost upon high

Among the forsaken
Yet wanted as much
And sacred in time
For slipping the touch

Waiting in line
Where none can pursue
We say our goodbyes
And dream the night through

In silence we shall speak
So words cannot confuse
The essence that we seek
The meaning we would lose

So do not trust your eyes
To tell the secret true
For many in disguise
Come prancing into view

But only touch my hand
And listen to my heart
So you will understand
The Love that I impart

With time to believe
And none to regret
We waste it all now
And hope to forget

But shadows concede
And clouds will drift on
Though time will remember
Where all have now gone

And though it seems far
And the future so vast
The morning comes quick
And the night ever fast

Come join me if you will
And we shall take a walk
Where the moonlight brings a chill
And the treetops sit and talk

To a place I found in dreams
And visit in the night
Where the weeping willow gleams
From the moon’s forsaken light

So follow me and see
The secrets I have found
Where spirits wander free
And the silence is profound

And maybe you will find
In a setting so surreal
A beauty unconfined
And be lost in what you feel

The darkness seems to trick the mind
And lead the heart astray
And tempt the feelings left behind
To blend with those today

And often when the light is low
In spirit or in thought
On journeys to the past we go
To lands of Love forgot

So when the sun begins to part
Especially in youth
Be careful that you trust your heart
To give the honest truth

For truth is found among the light
And in the wake of day
And Love is always shining brighter
Than the nights portray

Throughout my first score years and four
I’ve Loved and laughed and Loved some more
But hope indeed
Through word or deed
Each year is better than before

For I have learned in little time
And penned from time to time in rhyme
All moments passed
Until the last
Are sacred, equal, and sublime

Is this Love contagious
Would she catch it if she could
Is Loving advantageous
To the daring one that would

And has a heart more use
Than that which it portrays
The power to produce
A teardrop’s misty haze

And in the precious moment
When we feel our very soul
Is this but Love’s intent
Has it reached it’s only goal

Do we have the time
Or years in life to know
How much we waste it all
How far it all would go

And do we even care
For that which we destroy
To make what we create
Or times that we enjoy

And why must we go on
Without an end in sight
Where all before have gone
Avoiding all that’s right

Quite useless it may be, but anyway
I guess that Time has passed enough to say
So often I find Loneliness abed
Where once the tears of Happiness were shed

Watching as I brave the lonely Night
Crying in the absence of the Light
Wishing you were lying by my side
And hoping that the waves of Pain subside

I spend my precious time in slow pursuit
For treasures in this life I know exist
To find a piece of heaven on my route
And clench it with my heart’s almighty fist

And all along the way I seem to find
Among a world overflowed by hate
The ecstasy of leaving it behind
And resting in the tender hands of fate

Where everything that happens surely will
For reasons that I never will have known
And maybe after all and ever still
The treasures that I seek will be my own

I smell Him on the gentle winds
In spring that pass me by
I see Him in the sunlit fields
And in the summer sky

I hear Him in the finch’s song
So pure and full of grace
And taste Him in the morning rains
That falls upon my face

And every second of my life
And all that I explore
I pray will bring me closer still
To feel and Love Him more

The question really still remains
Unanswered through the steps of time
Who controls the pouring rains
And who the sacred sun sublime

And surely after we have gone
A thousand years without a sound
The question will be asked again
Without an answer to be found

To say I missed her wouldn’t quite compare
To how it felt to Love her from afar
‘Tis but to call a purple diamond rare
Or say the sun is but a faded star

For every night I see her in my sleep
Where dreams can turn the darkness into light
And bring to life the memories we keep
Hidden in the secrets of the night

And every morning since that I’ve awaken
Slowly to the sound of breaking day
I find the pillow next to me forsaken
Where once a piece of heaven used to lay

And if my rhymes could touch her distant heart
With tender words repeated from afar
I’d swim the oceans keeping us apart
And kiss her lips beneath the brightest star

I stumbled sadly to the bank
And watched the waters trickle by
My eyes were fixed, my face was blank
My mind was tired of wondering why

The clouds were slowly closing in
And thunder only steps behind
The rain would soon pour down within
And flood the rivers of my mind

But as the waters trickled by
And slowly washed away from me
So the tears that left my eye
Washed away your memory

I hope that I find strength enough and time
When all my days of weariness have passed
To lift a tired hand and put to rhyme
A wisdom even I could not outlast:

Though longed for in the eager hearts of men
And searched for in the distant skies above
Eternity is not the journey’s end
But found in every second spent in Love

From the moment we open our eyes
To the fall of the last ray of sun
We race through this life in disguise
To look back on the places we’ve run

But soon will all understand
When age has made everything clear
That life is more precious at hand
Than watched through a rear-view mirror

I’m just a man with sore tattoos
That decorate my skin
And each one burns a separate fuse
That leads to pain within

And I have tried to hide away
The ink that I reveal
Succeeding only to delay
The hurt that I conceal

But maybe if I just give in
The memories will cease
And I will find that deep within
My heart can rest in peace

I know until the day I die
I never will have beat the clock
But still I ask without reply
“Why must you ever tick and tock”

And all the while age has come
To gloat upon my wrinkled skin
That life will quickly death become
And cleanse the world of my sin

With locks of every auburn sun
Setting in the western sky
Her beauty flows as rivers run
To greet the Lillies in July

And all the sunlight in the land
Reaching far across the skies
Seems to rest on every strand
And swim the oceans of her eyes

And like a single summer’s day
Sent from heaven to embrace
My words can only half portray
The sweet surrender of her grace

Let’s go down to the water’s edge
And dip our toes in youth
And hold each other’s hand and pledge
To speak the honest truth

About our lives and where they went
And all the wasted time
And all the world’s wonderment
That passed us in our prime

And maybe at the water’s edge
We’ll find a little peace
Jumping further from the ledge
And swimming in release

The days, oh how they come so fast
And quickly flutter to the past
Where all that visited before
Are memories and nothing more

Where dreams are held and secrets kept
Where Love is lost and tears are wept
Where all the moments we invest
Are gathered up and laid to rest

Everybody wants to be
The light upon another’s face
Bringing life to all they see
With one beloved sweet embrace

And all have yearned to be the star
That shines in someone else’s sky
The beauty touching from afar
And twinkling in another’s eye

But giving all your Love to one
Never really quite compares
To the feeling that will come
When they return your Love with theirs

Oh sea, thou are a friend to me
Though seldom do I visit thee
And though the times we share are few
My heart is always lost in you

Dreaming of a sky so clear
The sunlight almost draws a tear
And on the breeze that passes by
My troubles vanish with a sigh

So when my spirit needs a friend
I close my eyes and just pretend
My ship has left behind the shore
And I am sailing evermore

What pain does now adorn thy brow
What sadness troubles thee
Reveal it now, and this I vow
Your secret’s safe with me

So name the fear that brought thy tear
And tore your world apart
And I’ll be near, with ardent ear
To offer thee my heart

I turned away the Lord, on father’s dying day
For all that I adored
He quickly took away

And that became the day, so overcome with pain
I shouted at the Lord
And cursed his name in vain

“What reason can you give for taking father’s breath?”
“I never will forgive”
“Not once before my death”

And so I traveled on, alone throughout my days
My Love for Him foregone
No reason to give praise

But though I did resist the feelings from before
Though father I had missed
My soul I missed much more

The way I used to feel it, burning deep inside
Before I lost the Love
Before my father died

Yet he is still alive, and he still watches me
In Heaven with the Lord
And always here with me

And that’s when I forgave, and Loving, did avow
Two fathers I had then
And two fathers I have now

I remember when my ears could hear
Reverberating in the distant fall
The melody of life aloud and clear
And I could feel the rhythm of it all

In everything I saw and all around
I felt this inner beauty in my heart
Giving me a feeling so profound
That earth was but a canvas full of art

But now for holy rapture I explore
And hunt for all the music in the air
That came to me so easily before
When I was just a boy without a care

How hopeless is the man who lives alone
And only yearns for that which he creates
From stories wrapped in fantasies unknown
To dreams in which he revels and awaits

And how is he to venture from the hole
He dug when all the world couldn’t see
The darkness that was burdening his soul
And frolic in the pleasures that will be

When he can open up and leave behind
The memories his heart has all but bled
To search for all the rapture in his mind
And leap upon the life that lies ahead

I wish my jaded eyes could See
Hope in you I’ve lost in Me
That found me once and will Again
My heart though dark remembers When
Love could save my soul, and I
Would search for you until I Die

Some would say that money talks, yet I would not agree
For I have found that solemn walks and heaven speak to me
And theirs is but a song of pain, while mine a song of joy
A gift of heavenly refrain, and theirs the horse of Troy
So learn a lesson quite divine, that many will pass by
Your life is but a glass of wine, quite endless in supply
But only if in God above, you trust and fears surpass
Will He provide your life with Love and always fill your glass

What need I say of growing old
What gauntlet can compare
To losing all that we behold
And dying in despair

What sadness matches the regret
We harvest in the end
When we are but a silhouette
In memories of a friend

What sorrow equals that of those
Who keenly passed away
What power can be found in prose
To ease the disarray

For nothing in my wisest breath
Can possibly foretell
The anguish in approaching death
Or fear of my farewell

Fool or genius, friend or foe
Dream a dream to free your soul
And let your hidden feelings go
To wander out of your control

And only there can you be sure
That fear and worry won’t pursue
And you are free to taste the cure
That while awake you never knew

So whether genius or a fool
Remember life and all it seems
Though full of hate and often cruel
Is always perfect in your dreams

I think I’ll wander off
Where nature’s children play
And leave behind the life
That led my soul astray

And there I hope to find
What life’s routine has stole
That feeling so sublime
Of Nature, God, and Soul

Where everything is true
And worries can’t survive
Where dreams are still in view
And hope is still alive

I found myself upon the sacred sands
Of time, and wondered how it came to be
That perfect was the world where I stand
And polished was the surface like the sea

No marks were left by all who trod before
No outline of a foot in sand depressed
So wondered I, perhaps a separate shore
Was waiting there for each of us in rest

And only when we perish do we find
That life and death are more than we suspect
And though apart, the two are intertwined
And we are just the place where they connect

And maybe time was crafted so ideal
To leave no mark of any man who dies
And living, just like dying, so surreal
That one is just the other in disguise

And maybe I have walked these very shores
Before, but never as it now had seemed
And maybe life and death are simply doors
Among the many hallways I have dreamed

Why is it that time goes by
At such a rapid pace
Why lost in every little sigh
Are moments that we waste

What benefit does Time assume
To age us quick and fast
And what is offered to the tomb
If moments never last

I ask to simply satisfy
A need to understand
Who profits when I say goodbye
Whose kingdom will expand

Ah, the smell of fallen rain
The teardrops on the grass
The beads of lasting pain
That never seem to pass

They force me to recall
And beg me to arise
As anxious teardrops fall
From dark and jaded eyes

And so they seem to play
Among the misty fern
While I just fade away
And wait for their return

Sinking deep inside
And falling fast below
Where only secrets hide
And only dreams will go

Where do all the feelings go
That used to live inside
And how do I rekindle those
That flickered out and died

For I have searched to no avail
The bittersweet debris
But lost among a field of tears
They hide inside of me

And now I need to find a way
To taste that Love again
And beg my heart to reconnect
With how I felt back then

I often sit at quite a loss
For words and witty ponderings
And doodle sad nostalgic thoughts
Of all my boyish wanderings

But in the end it always leaves
The bitterness of time gone by
For all the things a boy believes
Will gather dust and bring a sigh

When age has stripped him of his might
And time has worn away
The peace he felt throughout the night
And joy throughout the day

Pull the curtains back and let me in
I want to be the sunlight on your skin
I want to be the warmth on every curve
And kiss upon the tip of every nerve

Touching you in ways I never could
And holding you the way I always should
For only then would I be satisfied
And only then would thoughts of you subside

No matter where I go, I still see you
An ever-constant presence in my view
And as a cloud that drifts across the sky
You whisper in the wind that passes by

And everywhere I look and all I see
A memory of you gazes back at me
From every wound to every fading scar
I try to close my eyes, but there you are

Staying ever close, no distant star
Has loneliness enough or distance far
To keep your presence hid or memory
From dwelling inside everything I see

The day was crafted from the finest things
And fashioned for them both with equal care
A boy with all the wind beneath his wings
And a girl with all the beauty God could spare

They walked a little pathway hand-in-hand
Laid before them by the hands above
Asking not but beauty of the land
And needing but serenity and Love

Until they came upon a second road
Branching ever slightly from their own
Deciding in the face of all forebode
Which path to take into the sweet unknown

The boy looked down the road of greater awe
And wondered what excitement there would be
But opting for the beauty that she saw
The girl looked down the road of ecstasy

So off they went upon their separate ways
Each one engulfed in his or her affair
The boy was in the sunlight stealing rays
And the girl was picking daisies for her hair

But soon the flowers faded where she stood
And he ran out of comfort in the sun
As each of them now vaguely understood
How much they cared about the other one

“My path is full of intrigue” said the boy
Yet what I lack it never could provide
“And mine is lined with happiness and joy”
“Yet not enough,” the lonely girl replied

It was the other’s heart that each did miss
And both cried out the same whole-hearted prayer
To renew life before their parting kiss
And this time choose a path that they could share

But just as he was saddened with regret
He saw another trodden road was near
And she looked up as well to where they met
And both raced forth and left a fallen tear

And when they met in heaven’s perfect light
With hearts so filled with Love they could explode
They kissed and promised always to hold tight
Whenever they approached a branching road

And sure enough, the boy and girl did show
That Love that’s meant to be will always be
And any path they choose, they’ll always know
That hand-in-hand forever they will be

Football is a metaphor
For life that’s all around
And every day we hike the ball
To play another down

Staring at our enemies
And waiting to be sacked
Remembering the victories
That matter not, in fact

For each day is a separate game
With victors of its own
And he who won just yesterday
Could soon be overthrown

So play the game with all your heart
And focus on the ball
And one day you will get your chance
To rise above them all

The turtle envies not the man
Who hurries on his way
But moves as slowly as he can
To savor all the day

Each step is taken with a care
The man would never show
Each breath is filled with sweeter air
Than man will ever know

His thoughts are of the ripest fruit
And all that nature brings
While man is trapped in sad pursuit
Of foolish little things

His dreams are filled with purple plums
And yellow daffodils
And all the while man succumbs
To superficial thrills

So ask me which I’d rather be
And here is what I’ll say
I’ve been the turtle most my life
The man for just a day

And if I could I’d choose to be
The turtle from now on
For I have learned serenity
In man has long been gone

A thousand tears before we met
A thousand since you went away
A thousand I will soon regret
And more with each new passing day

A thousand pieces of my heart
A thousand prayers made in fear
A thousand sorrows I impart
But find again each coming year

And I have begged to reach the end
Of sorrow’s bittersweet embrace
That I am hopeless to transcend
That time is helpless to erase

I ask for splendid summer nights
And pray that I shall live
To dine upon the brilliant sights
That nature has to give

Grant me time to taste the sky
And nature’s casserole
To sample heaven’s a la carte
And satisfy my soul

Pile daisies on my plate
And sprinkle on some dew
Perhaps a side of butterflies
A hummingbird or two

Bake a pie of orioles
A dish of ocean sand
A velvet sunset in a bowl
A red one, I demand

And later on, the sweetest smell
That ever drifted by
And colors that, so beautiful
Evade the human eye

So fill my cup with sunshine
And top it with the breeze
And I shall toast the mountains
And salute the sacred seas

I’m asking Lord, to meet the sweetest girl
That ever walked upon the sands of time
I’m begging please, to find in all the world
The one who sets my lonely heart to rhyme

For I have seen her many times before
Each time I lay my head upon the sand
To shut my eyes and leave behind the shore
And walk with her forever hand-in-hand

So here’s another lonely man’s request
A humble prayer shouted out above
That I would lay this tired pen to rest
If I could only find the one I Love

Bound by curiosity
To creatures great and small
In vain superiority
We live above them all

High upon our pedestal
Sitting tall and proud
And deeming nature beautiful
While tearing up the shroud

A sin of greater potency
Than ever we assume
But hide behind our apathy
Until we meet our tomb

I give to you a gift of red
To place beside your sacred bed
And touch your heart the whole night through
With perfect sleep and dreams come true

And when you wake to brilliant red
Dancing slowly by your bed
Know that I’m in Love with you
And no one else will ever do

…as long as I live

The ebb and flow of mental tide
And waters that subdue
Have veiled the face I wear inside
And torn my heart in two

For secrets don ornate disguise
When in the public view
Yet bare themselves in naked eyes
Where stories are but true

The time will come for everyone
To finally see the sky
The blanket warmth of yellow sun
And breezes blowing by

The gentle fade from dark to light
The moonlight’s sad goodbye
The way the stars adorn the night
And greet the passerby

The clouds that bring back memories
When dreams were still in reach
The calm and peaceful liberties
That nature seems to preach

The colors born in summertime
That age throughout the year
With beauty spoken not in rhyme
And heard not by the ear

But seen when sunlight breaks at dawn
And saturates the skies
When pain and foolish doubt are gone
And peace shines in their eyes

Yet when they finally see the sky
A sadness will arrive
For letting beauty pass them by
The years they were alive

To find the greatness of a man
Look in the eyes of those suppressed
For power isn’t taken
But given by the ones impressed

And taken back with equal haste
As if it never real
For people rise above a man
As often as they kneel

I wonder what the world holds
For those without a clue
Who take the days one at a time
Not knowing what to do

And could this be the very way
That we were meant to be
Subtle ships among the waves
Lost upon the sea

Without a waiting destiny
To guide us to the shore
Alone with curiosity
And oceans to explore

So soft your breath upon my fervish skin
And pure the heart that trembles deep within
So blue the eyes that peer into my soul
And warm the lips to which my own do pull

These feelings and emotions that time froze
My eyes now only witness when they close
For these are just the memories that I know
The never ending thoughts of long ago

When Night has made it hard to see
Will you be lying next to me?
I hope you will, and beg you please
Kiss me, weaken both my knees
You alone can touch my soul
Again I ask you, make me whole
My lips and yours will reunite
Love will bind us in the night

Each morning as I lie awake in bed
Scrambled dreams drift through my weary head
And while they’re floating by, my best attempt
Fails to make the truth of what was dreamt

From crashing waves upon the stormy seas
To gentle rides upon the blowing breeze
As real as these sights feel upon my eyes
They vanish like the moon in morning skies

Even when we are so far apart
You still have a home inside my heart
To keep you warm in times of bitter cold
And fill you with a Love that won’t grow old

So take this poem with you when you leave
And read it if you ever disbelieve
The Love I have is still so strong and true
And every breath I take, I take for you

Nothing puts a burden on the heart
Or casts a shadow sadly on the soul
As Loved ones slowly drifting far apart
And keeping only fragments of the whole

So cherish those who fill your life with joy
And tell them how you feel with no delay
Let emotions show without decoy
And never let them drift a day away

Every moonstruck night
Cascading in the beams
Sweet thoughts of you ignite
My fantasies and dreams

I close my wanton eyes
And anxiously embark
On artificial lies
And fiction in the dark

To pause reality
Until the morning comes
When perfect reverie
Reluctantly succumbs

I learned so long ago
That God hides in the light
He walks with me by day
And comforts me by night

Standing by my side
Always in control
He fills my heart with joy
And captivates my soul

And like a Loving friend
Who listens when I cry
He’ll take me by the hand
Upon the day I die

I have a secret I would like to share
A feeling until now I couldn’t bare
No longer can I hide
Emotions deep inside
And now it’s time to make your heart aware

So even if it is a big mistake
A chance on you is one I have to take
I can’t keep holding back
This want for which I lack
To hold you close and be there when you wake

I want you like the flower wants the rain
And need you like the wind upon the vane
To give my heart direction
Loving in perfection
You and I together could obtain

And mountains laid before us we would climb
Our souls united sacred and sublime
So if you feel the same
Just let your heart proclaim
And we would be together for all time

Many times I’ve raised and eye
To greet the stars above
And chose the brightest in the sky
To make a wish for Love

And many times it has come true
But all have failed to last
So just as those before shall you
Be settled in the past

Another Love that I will lack
Another wish untrue
Another star that answered back
That I could not have you

Had I found the book of us
And read the last page first
I still would take a single kiss
And suffer all the worst

For all the pain cannot compare
To memories that we’ve made
That bring me comfort in the night
Worth all the tears I’ve paid

Shattered dreams we borrow
Shed pain upon the morrow
A day of constant sorrow
A painful omen of tomorrow

Our hearts have all been broken
Our fears have all been woken
A cruel and heartless token
Of hatred left unspoken

And tears fall down in mourn
Our families sadly torn
Our bodies weak and worn
In blood our streets adorn

Yet through the clouds of dust
While crying in disgust
We stand so proud and just
For God we all do trust

Autumn is the saddest time of year
When color slowly fades from earth and sky
The loss of beauty drawing but a tear
And leaving only dust to dry the eye

And for awhile the world falls asleep
A slumber only wintertime could bring
The rivers cry and willows truly weep
Waiting to be born again in spring

That night we danced so slowly in the rain
I know lives in your memory just the same
And just as I’ve been hanging in the slack
You fail to keep your heart from going back

And often times when life is full of pain
You close your eyes and dream about the rain
Falling ever softly on your face
And lose yourself within my sweet embrace

And though you hide behind a shield of pride
You can’t deny emotions deep inside
That shine upon your face and in your eyes
Every time the rain invades the skies

I saw a flower just the other day
A greeting from above in nature’s gentle way
Sharing all its beauty with the world around
Knowing not a thing
Making not a sound

I stopped to say hello, if only for awhile
A moment of my time for solace and a smile
It nodded softly back, so perfect and profound
Knowing not a thing
Making not a sound

I passed it every day, until the summer’s end
A living work of art I humbly do commend
Oh what a piece of heaven that my eyes have found
Knowing not a thing
Making not a sound

But one day it was gone, as quickly as it came
And though I traveled on, life was not the same
The earth brought many more, and yet I sadly frowned
Knowing not a thing
Making not a sound

Yet from that moment on, I had a great respect
For beauty all around I somehow did neglect
And now I simply watch the Lord work all around
Knowing not a thing
Making not a sound

If levees of fear so strong
Hold back the rivers of bold
May sadness be your song
And sweetness what you sold

For past the walls of pain
You’ll hear a peaceful sound
In the waters of your gain
Serenity is found

Close your eyes and let me share with you
The hurt and pain your words have put me through
Like ships upon the shore
I wanted so much more
But shatter dreams is all that you could do

I clung to every baiting lie you told
And spent my heart on fables that you sold
A single zealous kiss
A momentary bliss
A royal flush that weakness made you fold

And every day reluctant to awake
I lie in bed reliving your mistake
A feeling oh so sad
A Love we could have had
The memory of a dream you did forsake

Looking back upon that night
I gently reminisce
Lost again in sweet delight
And falling deep in Love’s abyss

Reliving secret memories
Protected by the night
Fooled again by guarantees
In dream we reunite

And back on that romantic cloud
The two of us will be
As whispers from the past so loud
Come calling back to me

And I remember how it felt
That sacred virgin kiss
And how it made our bodies melt
Into a state of bliss

That lasted ’til the morning light
Like many nights before
Where I will be again tonight
To kiss your lips once more

Memories fade in time
But ink, my friend, does not
What’s been written down
Can never be forgot

So let the paper share
The feelings that you keep
The smiles that you wear
And tears you gently weep

Put secrets that you hide
Between the stripes of blue
And paper will provide
A home forever through

Dreaming is the heart’s immortal toy
And in these dreams are wishes that we hold
But sad will be the man, who as a boy
Dreamed the things he dreams when he is old

For those that linger on a lifetime through
Carry with them all that’s left unseen
Representing wishes out of view
And tokens of time wasted in between

When all the days connect to one
And somber skies conceal the sun
Sleep is mixed with wasted time
And pain pours out in tonic rhyme

When darkness fills your broken heart
And sadness tears your life apart
The shortest moments feel so long
And wounds live on in bitter song

So write until your pen is spent
And listen to youre heart’s content
But only sleep can calm the noise
And only time delivers poise

As you read my words, you also read my heart
Pieces of my soul alive in written art
Sharing all the pain and Love I’ve known
Together you and I have lived and grown

You’ve been there when my Love was burning strong
You’ve been there when my days were sad and long
Through words you feel my darkness and my sun
And for these moments you and I are one

I wonder why I let you go
To take the other road
My heart was young so long ago
A wild horse I rode

And many other girls I know
True Love I have possessed
But I compared them all to you
And none have passed the test

Yet now you’re back in sight and mind
Still beautiful and sweet
With all the things I hope to find
In every girl I meet

And I have simply one request
Please dance with me tonight
And maybe Love will do the rest
And we will reunite

With broken chisels in your hand
You stare at choices etched in stone
And now my words you understand
Your graveyard of regret has grown

And just as I had promised so
You’re left with all you lack
Too late to let your feelings show
You’re longing to go back

But I have since forgotten you
Those memories I’ve released
Your change of heart is overdue
And my Love for you deceased

I walked upon her wicked wire
Just a victim of desire
And though I lacked a safety rope
My fear was calmed by foolish hope

Imprisoned by her siren song
Her friendly lure was too strong
And what I thought were angel eyes
Were just an ominous disguise

Her lips of guile I have kissed
Her potion I could not resist
And every droplet took from me
My heart and all its rhapsody

I can’t believe you left me here
Your heart still beating in my hand
Befriended only by a tear
As castles crumble back to sand

And all that you have said and done
Has killed the biggest part of me
And like the moon without the sun
A shell of what I used to be

Without you I feel broke and battered
Hating all that I’ve become
And losing all that ever mattered
Turned this body cold and numb

My blood is now a tired stream
Resting idle in my veins
And finding shelter in a dream
My heart escapes from bitter pains

Leaving me so close to death
With only time to wonder why
You took away my final breath
The day you came to say goodbye

I never thought I’d end up here
In such a lonely place
And never thought I’d have this look
Of sadness on my face

And lying here all by myself
This pain I can’t deny
Yet nothing I can do will stop
The days from passing by

But how was I to know that life
Would toss me this surprise
And how was I to know these tears
Would pour down from my eyes

I can only live my life
The best way that I can
Accepting every tear that falls
As part of God’s great plan

Your burden has been lifted
This life is finally mine
Left as just a memory
You’re lost inside a written line

Resting on a dusty shelf
Holding hands with time
Your memory is locked away
Trapped inside forgotten rhyme

And now my heart is free of pain
Your poison gone from my drink
I’ve buried you on sheets of white
Your reaper was my pen and ink

Time will mend and time will heal
But will time ever make it real?
This dream that you will finally see
All the Love inside of me

And how you need me just as much
Your body aching for my touch
I’d fill your every heart’s desire
And turn this flame into a fire

But only if your heart would see
How perfect both our lives could be
If you would simply take my hand
And let me help you understand

That surely we belong as one
Our hearts would beat in unison
And we would Love in such a way
No foolish poet could portray

Our Love was once so sweet and pure
For all my pains she was the cure
The only girl that caught my eye
A single star that lit my sky

And there I thought she’d always be
Forever standing next to me
Hand-in-hand and heart-to-heart
Our Love would never fall apart

But down upon my knees I kneel
For even though it felt so real
The star that is no longer mine
In someone else’s sky will shine

And on my shoulder sits the blame
The was that feeds a dying flame
A choice that’s now a huge mistake
Which left me drowning in the wake

So every night and ever day
To the Lord I beg and pray
That I could have just one more chance
To earn again that sweet romance

And once again I’d call her mine
Our constellations back in line
And days would take the place of night
My darkness filled by her sweet light

Let the purple sky fall over me
And touch me with the elegance of time
Wash me with the waters of the sea
And lift me high as any bird can fly

Let me feel perfection at its peak
And fill me with a candid sense of joy
Time I lack for the all the things I seek
And yesterday it seems I was a boy

And now my greatest fear is to forget
Or even worse to never even know
The wonders that are waiting for me yet
The places that my heart has yet to go

Like birds so high up in the air
Just soaring by without a care
With gentle wind upon my face
Forever touched by simple grace

Like leaves still falling from a tree
On my own so wild and free
Without a thought of where to land
A tiny part of something grand

Just floating through this life with pride
On wings of freedom I shall glide
With skies so endless and so bright
I’ll always be a bird in flight

So romantic was that night
The two of us in candlelight
We sat alone and spoke of Love
With words I can’t stop dreaming of

Then so soft and heavenly
You gave the perfect gift to me
And all that’s left to say in this:
Thank you sweetness, for that kiss

Those thought of you that keep me up all night
Are surely wrong, but always feel so right
A single hope persuades my eyes to close
To dream of just one kiss, one touch, one rose

So wonderful to see you in my sleep
That waking from it causes me to weep
And when I do, a sadness fills my heart
With morning comes the truth that we’re apart

I wonder if it’s Love inside I feel
That makes me with my dreams could just be real
And time would pause to give us our one chance
To let our feelings grow, outside of circumstance

I’d cherish you and maybe I’d convince
You to be my girl, and I could be your prince
We’d look into each other’s eyes and dance
The beginning of a fairy-tale romance

One I dream of each and every night
And tell you now with each new rhyme I write
To touch your face or gently kiss your lips
Would be like sweetness on my fingertips

A feeling I may never get to know
A place my heart may never get to go
I’d never see how sweet this dream could be
I’d never feel how warm your Love could be

But one thing that I have is so divine
A place to go where you are always mine
Where kisses last forever, and roses are so red
We’ll always be together, in dreams within my head

Every day I wake with sorrow
Another day, a gone tomorrow
Time goes by and worlds spin
But still I carry pain within

A deep regret that tears away
And leaves me buried in dismay
I try but can’t outrun my past
Forever in the shadows cast

But still I run and cling to hope
That one day I will find the rope
To pull myself out of this hole
And purge the sins that taint my soul

When we are so far apart
Can sorrow touch your tender heart?
I Love you girl, I really do
Sleep is sweet with dreams of you
All of you is like a rose
Night has come, so I must close
With this I leave one thought in mind
You must read the first word of each line

The light creeps in the window
And the shadows slip away
The night has left its post
To make room for the day

And now the sounds have come
That beg the sun to rise
The trees and birds and sky
Have opened up their eyes

The earth is now alive
And as I wake I see
The simple beauty all around
That God has given me

And right away my mind is free
My goals and dreams are clear
I’m thankful for the time I have
And those that I hold dear

And every time I step outside
And soak up all in sight
My soul is lifted high above
For I have seen the light

The way that I feel
When you are with me
Is exactly how I
Dream heaven will be
Your beautiful hair
Your delicate skin
The way that your eyes
Seem to draw me in
To give you a kiss
For our bodies to touch
To whisper in your ear
That I Love you so much
It’s hard to explain
Though I know it’s for real
No words could describe
The way that I feel

You will take your road
And I will take mine
But in both of our skies
The same sun will shine

So take comfort in knowing
That wherever we are
We can look to the sky
And see the same star

Love is a rose
Beginning to bloom
Slowly opening
Filling a room
With beauty and calm
Wherever it blows
Love is a rose

Love is a rose
Of many hues
A symbol of joy
With hearts to amuse
With each tender kiss
One suddenly knows
Love is a rose

When all the flowers have faded
And fallen fast away
You’ll find my Love unchanging
And constant each new day

When all the leaves have fallen down
And left the trees so bare
My Love will still be strong
And just for you to share

When snow and cold have filled the air
And wintertime is here
My Love will always keep you warm
And fill your heart with cheer